A Graduation!

Last week, our middle grandson graduated early from high school and will be going to Flight School: a first step to becoming a pilot. He is expecting to have his Private Flying License this summer. Because we now also live in Apex, I was able to attend the ceremony of 35 graduating students, and that after watching a basketball game of the youngest, on his way to become the tallest of the family. After all that we all went out for dinner and I had a most delicious hamburger, the first one in a very long time. It was so wonderful to go out with family, and to know that a good friend was keeping Mike company. Mike is not interested in large gatherings – still very cautious to not catch anybody’s bug. Knock on wood: we both have been very lucky for years in that respect.

Groomed!

Lani finally had a grooming session with one of the local groomers and she is now “in the loop.” What a blessing: we could hardly see her eyes any more, even though I tried to snip away some hair around them a few times. So now all three of us have hair stylists established and are all “in the loop”, each in our own specialty shop. Mine is in “Cloud Nine”, and I think, based on the first cut, that he is a keeper.

MyCharts and Patient Portals 

Each of us needs one such “Chart” for every doctor to exchange messages, get test results and see upcoming and past appointments. We never had such means of communication with our doctors before: I would just send them an email and get a response in not too long a time. But now, to set those all up, fill out questionnaires and then to communicate with all of our doctors is not only complicated, but extremely time consuming. I hope that all that will be flowing in due time, and I must agree that it is practical from the point of view that doctors are extremely busy.

New Fridge, new Printer, new Toaster Oven

When it rains, it pours, they say. All these appliances broke down in a matter of two weeks. What a blessing that Dennis lives close by and was able to help with unpacking, installation and setup. Of course I tried to do some things on my own, but I called Dennis when I injured my left leg on the sharp corner of the carton box of the toaster oven.

Crystals in my head

A neurologist (I now have my own neurologist!) determined that my dizziness has to do with imbalanced portals in my head, not a problem with my brain. I am signed up for ten weekly appointments with a Physical Therapist in Cary. I am learning that my Unilateral Vestibular Hypofunction is on the left side, which is also the eye with a sightly lesser vision. I have 20/20 and 18/19 vision. Absolutely something to be super happy about, because I do not need glasses or contacts to see even the smallest print at a distance. And that at 84 years of age! So I am very happy. But with exercises at home, and the ten week sessions in Cary, I hope to improve my left-sided imbalance. This was the test I failed, and please try it yourself if you want to know how it feels. I  thought it was very interesting. Stand in a corner with your feet together, arms crossed and eyes closed, on a 2″ thick peace of foam, for thirty seconds, and do that three times. I got to six seconds the first time, then four, then six again. Each time I fell into the left wall. Of course I wanted to know if I could correct that. And yes, they think I can!

Meetings with my best friend

Because all my appointments are in Cary, and I have a caregiver at home for Mike, I will have time to meet with my best friend in Waltonwood every Friday. I have missed that contact since we moved, and am delighted I will be visiting with her again.

A long-time, very good friend of ours in the Netherlands, who has been suffering for years of almost unbearable health problems, wrote us in a final farewell email that he was finally allowed to go to sleep on January 30, today, and his cremation would be on Friday at noon. It makes me think.

Someone I know recently wrote that only one time in his life he had been able to fully enjoy the moment; to be somewhere, to do something at one time and consciously love it. Only once! How do you feel about that? Do you often consciously revel in an experience? Or always? Or never?

Today, Monday, is a day without appointments, so I sat down at my computer to write, instead of fill out doctors’ questionnaires. It was a joy beyond measure!

Hoping you are well and sending you my best

Until next time!

Ronny

 

 

It’s a Wonderful World!

Absolutely. But I wish the days were twice as long. Not only have we moved into a new town, but we moved from a retirement community to a regular home. From “Doctors Making Housecalls” to finding new Primary Care Physicians, setting up “MyCharts” for each doctor and each person, and then responding to the questionnaires in those MyCharts. Endlessly!

I am not complaining, but there is a lot to learn and a lot to do. And every day is only 24 hours long. Slowly, but surely, we are finding our way around from the comfort of our lovely home. Waiting in doctors’ offices, I have been able to read a wonderful book; it’s just that I haven’t gotten to the computer much except for business.

Another difference is that our meals are no longer provided. But here is a miracle: in the next neighborhood, a half mile from our home, lives My Chef, who caters from his home. He has a 500 square feet kitchen. Every Tuesday night, he delivers meals to our neighborhood if we sign up for them. The menu is known on Friday afternoon. So far, every week we have had wonderful meals, healthy meals. When I asked him the first time if he would cook more evenings for us, he said no, he needed a $200 minimum for party catering. But the next week he said that he was often catering business lunches on Thursdays – would we be interested? You bet we were. On those specific Thursdays, he prepares two dinners especially for us, and then often an extra box with eggplant Parmesan or something else. We are blessed with delicious meals brought to our door several days a week.

But now I have to stop because I have to fix Sunday dinner. We are having a Kale salad and broccoli-cheese soup, all ready to go in the fridge. Much more news later!

Be a blessing to others and

Enjoy every day to the fullest!

Until next time,

Ronny

62 and counting!

What a wonderful day it was yesterday: our 62nd wedding anniversary. Nobody visited, but everyone was present. Surprises kept coming. An e-card with a pink champagne wish, a box with six fresh, warm donuts, cards, and texts from the grandkids, a bouquet of cream colored roses, another bouquet of mixed flowers and a bottle of champagne. Oh, a small one, so that we could finish it in one night 🙂

In the morning I went to a coffee gathering at the Club, where I met many of the neighbors. In the afternoon, our next-door neighbor brought the huge trash and recycling bins from the street all the way to our garage. And to top it all off, Steven, the Chef, delivered a delicious dinner of Chicken Wellington, fresh green beans, a green salad and a three-layer chocolate dessert.

Would you believe that we have a professional caterer, Chef Steven, living around the corner? He has a 500 square foot kitchen at his house; his wife makes delicious desserts. Every Tuesday night we can sign up for a delicious dinner, and often Steven saves two plates for us on Thursdays, when he caters a luncheon for a large group in Raleigh. The portions are so generous, that we sometimes have enough for lunch the next day.

On Monday morning, when I walked Lani before daybreak, I heard the plaintive sound of a Mourning Dove. I had never heard a sound like that in nature, and yet, I knew it. Many years ago, our daughter gave my mom a clock: a large, round clock with a green rim. Does anyone remember seeing or having a clock like that? At every hour, a different bird made a distinct sound. And I believe that at 4 o’clock it was a Mourning Dove’s call. I would like to know if I remember that correctly? I had no idea then, what it looked like, but now, when I googled it, I learned this: it used to be called Carolina pigeon or Carolina turtledove. It makes sense then, that I never heard it in Arizona or Hawai’i. 

I’m back at the computer, but can’t promise I will post regularly on Wednesday. Take it or leave it. I hope you will take it 🙂

Be thankful, be happy, be loving and kind

Life is precious, but getting shorter by the day

Ronny

 

2023! A New Year!

Peace, Love and Happiness to you in the new year! Let your dreams take flight!

I want to start my first post in the new year after a long sabbatical with some thought provoking statements from well known people that touched me at this time. Positive, active energy that I need after months of – it seems – standing still.

“Never underestimate the power you have to take your life in a new direction.” —Germany Kent

“Life’s not (only) about expecting, hoping and wishing, it’s about doing, being and becoming.” —Mike Dooley

“It always seems impossible until it’s done.” —Nelson Mandela

“It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves.” —William Shakespeare

“I don’t know where I’m going from here, but I promise it won’t be boring.” —David Bowie

“When life is sweet, say thank you and celebrate. When life is bitter, say thank you and grow.” —Shauna Niequist

“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.” —Socrates

Changes

Who could have thought that, after more than five happy years in a retirement community in Cary, we would be even happier in our own home in Apex? Our son, a top realtor, found us a house in a small community with a clubhouse and an outdoor pool; it has two bedrooms, two bathrooms, an office, a fireplace, hardwood floors, a fenced-in patio with a nice border and a huge garage: a dream house! The best thing is that we are only two miles from our son’s house, so we enjoyed family visits during the holidays and my birthday.

Mike’s infections are clearing up, and he has even walked outside in the brilliant sunshine of a 64 degree New Year’s day with Lani and me. Caregivers are helping me during the week, and as far as shopping is concerned, I am delighting in the services of Instacart and DoorDash as long as I have not become familiar with our new environment. Thank goodness for their help, because I still need time to organize closets, for opening boxes and trying to find places to put things or hang things.

Our house is light and airy, with more windows in every room than before in the cottage, but that means there is less wall space than before to hang our beloved art and artifacts. So we are trying to find a good home for things and are delighted that it works! In the giant closet in the laundry room we have designated three shelves for “give-away things”, and our cleaning lady and caregivers go “shopping” to their heart’s content each time they come and see new things on those shelves.

Our first haircuts – Mike’s, mine and Lani’s, were a disaster. Both Mike and I got a recommendation from someone in Cary, and both stylists butchered us. Because all local groomers were busy, I ended up with an appointment for Lani at PetSmart. That’s a long story…it ended after two and a half hours, when she was bathed, dried and groomed except for her face and tail. She stood on the table and looked miserable. They said it would take another two hours because she needed breaks because she was too nervous. Then the manager said, “Ma’m, we can’t finish this dog. Please take her home and come back another time. We will not charge you.” Lani took a beeline to the exit, me in tow, and I was happy she at least had a bath and part groom, and free of charge. I will do her ears and cut some hair away from her eyes. In February, one of our neighbors will introduce me to her groomer and we’ll make an appointment that will only last two hours instead of four.

Be kind to one another, love everybody.

Life is beautiful, but getting shorter by the day!

Until next time,

Ronny

 

 

 

 

 

Well, a lot can happen in one month of sabbatical! 

See for yourself:

 

Letter to our Waltonwood Friends

In 2017, we moved from Arizona to Cary, to be closer to our son and his family in Apex. We found Waltonwood and enjoyed five happy years here.

We settled in a lovely cottage at the end of the cul-de-sac, surrounded by nature. We enjoyed wildlife sauntering or running through our back yard, which has a little pond at the end: geese, snapping turtles, seven deer reaching for the birdbath, and even a red fox.

At night, we enjoyed frog sounds coming from the pond and saw fireflies flitting through the bushes. We planted a tree. A little pine seedling that I discovered in one of our flower pots four years ago grew up in a pot of its own, got decorated as a Charlie Brown Christmas tree and was finally planted at the end of the street.

Our move to Cary would not be our last: we are moving to Apex! A lovely house with hardwood floors and a fireplace in a nice community with a pool and a clubhouse will be the next home in our 61 years together.

We will miss the friends we made at Waltonwood. I left you two of my books to remember us by. We are thankful for your friendship and wish you many years of joy and many blessings.

Mike and Ronny de Jong

My sabbatical is not over yet! The busiest time is still to come in the next two weeks! But we are so happy, so very happy! The new house is only five minutes from our son’s house, so family popovers are less time consuming.

Miracles do happen! Look for the ones in your life!

Until next time,

Ronny

 

Guess what?

I  had to take Mike back to the hospital again, because his feet did not get better with the oral antibiotics. Last night at 9:00 p.m. he was finally admitted to a room of his own.

I am home this morning, Tuesday, for a brief time, then taking Lani to Daycare, because she is quite lonely during the day, with me coming and going. Dennis and I are going back and forth to the hospital – he is a big help.

And I am going to take a sabbatical again – there is no time for computering, as my former Dutch neighbor would say. In the recliner in Mike’s hospital room, during the times that he has been wheeled away for tests in other parts of the hospital, I am reading a delightful Dutch book that a friend gave me,  Mevrouw, Mijn Moeder, by Yvonne Keuls. Laughing out loud at times, recognizing many places and situations from memory, it takes me away from the exhausting days of the past week.

So please take care of your loved ones

Until next time -hope fully soon,

Ronny

Busy?

I thought last week was busy. But now I am busier than that. On Thursday morning I took Mike to the ER. They admitted him to the hospital that same afternoon because of two infections on both feet and kept him until Sunday afternoon. By the grace of God they discharged him on Sunday, when he proved he could walk a few steps with his walker, and I assured them that I could take care of the feet at home.

It’s wonderful to have him home again, but almost every minute of my time is spoken for. I am reminded of my dear friend in Prescott, who took care of her Dad for years, until he passed. What a labor of love. Hard labor, I know now. Caring for a loved one is one thing, but giving care in every aspect of life, all day long, plus change of medications that have to be taken on an empty stomach or just the opposite, with a meal, at designated times, is an exhausting job. But there are so many moments of joy, of great results, of gratitude, that it’s all worth it. Hospitals are a necessary evil at times.

Flu shots and Covid vaccines, Doctors appointments 

I’m filling our paperwork for the upcoming annual flu shots and the third Covid vaccine with Omicron. I finally got an appointment with and ENT for my dizziness to be checked; Mike got a followup appointment with the podiatrist, but the dermatologist is scheduling as far as December!

Good things

There are fewer Covid cases at the Club, but for now breakfasts and dinners are still delivered to the door, saving precious time. One day next week, we will get our storm door! The weather is still wonderful. Cooler in the early mornings, but still getting up to the sunny high seventies.

And that must be it for this week.

Be thankful for good health and safety,

Until next time,

Ronny

Facebook (Meta) Portal TV

This is an amazing device that lets you see a whole living room on your large screen TV instead of just a face on a cell phone when you FaceTime with someone. Mike got one for his birthday from our children and we have had many amazing FaceTime conversations with family and friends already. It is a small device, connected to your TV, with a remote control. It only works with people who have WhatsApp, and I have not been able to find all our friends on WhatsApp yet. It works best with others who have a similar device, so that you feel you are in each other’s living rooms! Two of our friends in Holland were immediately interested, and I found it for them on Amazon.nl. All over the world, Amazon has literally everything you would ever need or want, and membership means you don’t ever have shipping costs.

My week in review: dizzying!

After I wrote this paragraph about our new Portal TV, on Saturday, we had a very nice brunch at the Club with friends on Sunday, and then a whirlwind of things prevented me from writing anything else until now.

Monday morning I was dizzy – not pleasant, but a good excuse to stay put in my chair and watch all the procedures around the beautiful funeral service in Westminster Chapel, the tour to Windsor castle and the service there. (Memories came flooding back of a service in Windsor Chapel I attended sixty-three years ago, when I was an au-pair with a family in Northwood for a summer.)  The whole day was impressive and beautiful; I hope many of you saw it live or will watch it later on YouTube.

Then a morning when the dog threw up in my office; an email came from the Executive director that Waltonwood now has six Covid cases. For us that meant filling out menus, breakfasts and dinners being delivered to the door; a visit with Mike to the Podiatrist; several trips to the pharmacy to pick up prescriptions, a visit from the Primary Care doctor this morning at 7:45, when I had barely stepped out of the shower after walking the dog. I just had time to throw on my robe, put Lani in the office and open the door.

The temperature in the house kept going up yesterday, to 79 degrees, while I had the thermostat at 72. I switched both ceiling fans that we have up to fast speeds, that helped a little where we were sitting. I found out that the thermostat has two AA batteries – five years old by now – which I replaced. Thank goodness Amazon had just delivered a new box of them. A call to the front desk told me the person was on the phone, so I left a message: our air conditioning does not work. Nothing happened, and today nothing had changed: the ceiling fans are working but the temperature in the living room is now 80 degrees. I kept calling the front desk until I finally got a live person and was connected with Maintenance. We will send someone to look at it tomorrow afternoon. 

And then I discovered that it is Wednesday today and I used to publish a new Blog Post at 6:00 a.m. every Wednesday. Well, here it is, hot off the press!

Have a wonderful week, stay cool if you can, and

Until next time!

Ronny 

Our front yard (what’s in a name?) missing from the last post.

Life goes on

The dining room is open for sit down dining five days a week, and for Sunday brunch. We have decided, even if it would be nice to meet people, to pick up dinner and eat at home. Only Sunday brunch is special enough to go and stand in the omelette line and take home some things from the buffet for Sunday night.

A huge downpour filled up the pond again to an acceptable level, and I hope some of the fish survived living in a small puddle. Amazon comes and goes: they have everything under the sun, and I have become a good client. Most often I place an order just before bed, when I remember that there is something I need – soon! And Amazon delivers!

A Thai dinner

Last Tuesday, hosted by her husband and celebrated at our house, we got together with a total of six for a homecoming party with a Thai dinner. I got on the computer and planned to order everyone’s choices from our favorite Thai in Apex, to be delivered by Doordash. Duh! All Thai restaurants are closed on Tuesdays. I knew that of course, but it just had not registered that it was Tuesday. I frantically searched for other Thai menus online, found a Chinese restaurant that had yellow curry and fried rice and spring rolls, and so I ordered, to have it delivered just after our guests had arrived and we had poured some champagne. Well, Chinese Thai curry is just that, Chinese. I handed out chop sticks for some, because you need chop sticks for Chinese food. Thai food is eaten with a spoon and a fork; did you know that? It was not the wonderful food that we had had in mind, but we had a good time and our guests took all the leftovers home, which was great! Later on, when I looked up where this Chinese restaurant was located, I saw that it was all the way in Durham! That is why our Dasher had a hard time finding our address!

Advantage of a dental visit

For me, that is. I had an hour to fill when Mike had his cleaning done, and I opened a book on my Kindle. Wow! It had been months since I read a book. I chose a funny one, and am not sorry. Every free minute I read a little, and sometimes I can’t stop laughing. If you are interested, it’s a book by Dutchman Hendrik Groen, translated from Dutch and now an international bestseller. Two Old Men and a Baby. It was followed by two more books by the same author, and one of those became a movie. It takes place in the Netherlands and the scenes are recognizable for me. But really, anyone, if you want a good laugh, get this book. I am going to sit down and continue reading right now!

Be happy and until next time!

Ronny

P.S. I was in such a hurry to get to my book, that I forgot to publish it! So here it is, seven hours later!

 

Life at Waltonwood after Covid

Changes in the dining room

With many newly hired servers and cooks, the dining room management has put out enormous efforts to train them like waiters in restaurants. After the weekly brunch on Sunday mornings, we will have sit down dinners every night, instead of buffet dinners, and the servers will take our order on a pad right at the table. The choices are: the Daily Special or something from the list of items available every day. Most people are looking forward to the new system, which takes us one step closer to the dining room experience when we first got here, five years ago.

Renovation

Little by little, floor by floor, contractors have been hard at work. New wallpaper, new carpeting (not to everyones liking), new colors on doors and doorposts and hand rails. The carpet, in dark blue and grey, reminds me of a Rohrshach test; it’s not a light and bright uplifting color scheme. The wallpaper, nondescript, is alright, but they should have painted the ceiling a light, bright white – there are so many different nuances of white – to avoid the impression of walking down a long, dark tunnel. All this was decided by Management in Michigan before Covid, so there is nothing we can do about it. Happy that it does not affect the cottages!

Storm doors

We heard that the coveted storm doors for the cottages were ordered and delivered three months ago, but there was nobody available to install them. That is so disappointing! We could have had more light and a view of our front yard all summer! The front yard, by the way, which is the walk up to the front door, is like a jungle. The Hibiscus with flowers in three different colors, has grown to over 6 feet, as high as the front door – mostly leaves, with only an occasional bloom. The same is true for the beautiful red Dipladenia, at first blooming profusely, then sending out long vines, first clinging to a little trellis I put up, then to each other in a long, twirling rope against the wall: leaves and more leaves, but no flowers. What could be the reason? I only planted them in Miracle Grow potting soil, never fertilized them. The Basil is a foot tall, we had a nice harvest of tomatoes from one plant, which is gone now. I almost gave up on the second plant, because the top had been scorched by the heat. But then, as it showed a few little yellow flowers, I added some Miracle grow potting soil, fertilized it with Miracle Grow, and lo and behold, it is coming back into full bloom, with a promising number of about 20 little flowers. Miracles for sure! The white Gardenias on both sides of the path are lush and full, and I do hope we’ll get some fragrant flowers soon. We have a little frog that lives in our jungle. I see it once in a while, in one of the pots, or hiding behind one.

The pond

Most life seems to have disappeared from the pond. Its water level dropped drastically over the past two weeks, the fountain stopped working, and finally, after I reported it to the Executive Director, she said they would’ve it checked by the inspector after Labor Day. The large turtles have crawled through our back yard on their way to the ponds in Wimbledon, the frog choir is silenced, the blue heron has not been seen, and only “our” goose family of three comes to visit occasionally. There are now two divided puddles of water and I can indeed cross the pond with only my feet getting muddy. The temperatures have dropped, but are still in the high eighties, and we have had no rain lately. But all in all, we do not have anything to complain about. So many people all over the world are much worse off without rain or with too much of it. We are thankful to be where we are, in our beautiful, cozy cottage at the end of the street.

Activities

With residents moving: in (house), or across (to Assisted Living or Memory Care), or up (to heaven), many new people are moving in as well, too many for us to get to know, since we are not at the Club very often. They organize many activities, as well as shopping and dinner outings on the bus. We choose to attend a few music performances, but since I still have our wonderful Ford Escape, I can go out any time, and we indulge in the use of a Door Dasher to pick up and deliver occasional dinners from the Thai or one of the other restaurants around. We are blessed!

Farewell and Hello again

Several of our dear friends have passed away: in the hospital, with Hospice or just suddenly because of a fall or a heart attack. Their partners move to a smaller apartment, or to a whole different place, closer to children. Even when friends move across to AL or MC, they disappear from sight, and there is little time in my life to go visit. We rejoiced when a cottage friend came home from Rehab, and when my  best friend returned from a six week vacation in upstate New York. We are organizing a welcome home dinner from the Thai at our house, for the six of us, old and current cottage friends.

Cleaning house

After going through my wardrobe and giving away 25 pounds of clothing that I had not worn for one or more years, I have gone through our book shelves. The books that I absolutely still want to read, I put on my Kindle, and many others I gave to my friend, who is an avid reader together with her husband and has many bookcases full of books  around her house. Then there was this beautiful, thick, warm winter jacket of Mike’s, that he only wore once or twice, many years ago. I hesitated to take it to Dorcas (Goodwill) and drove around one day to see if I could find the family on Walmart’s street corner with a sign, asking for food or clothing. No needy people anywhere I went. I had to think of our December in New York city, when I walked around with leftover pizza in my hands, searching for a homeless person, until I finally found one in Central Park, lying on the grass in the sun under a thin blanket. Remember that blog post? Then, this morning, coming home from the barber shop, Johnnie, the trash man was just emptying the trash bin into his cart. ‘Johnnie is back’ I had heard. He does not speak English very well, is an older gentleman, a hard worker with always a friendly greeting. I called him over to the garage, showed him the jacket, pointed to his chest and shoulders, then to the jacket and a said “extra large? Do you want to have it?” He nodded happily, let me put it back in the brown bag, smiled a big “thank you” and drove away with his treasure on the floor by the back seat. Now that is how I like to give away things we have no use for anymore.

Time is Money 

I know for sure how precious my time is. There are not enough hours in the day that I can sit down and read a book. I do not have enough time for some things. So am I poor?  No way. I am taking care of Mike, the house, the dog and everything that has to do with all three. Plus visits to doctors and the dentist, the barbershop and more. I’m sure you know all about those things too. But it is so wonderful to be healthy and able to do everything that makes for a happy life for both of us. A thankful person is a happy person. And that’s the truth.

May you be happy and healthy.

Until next time,

Ronny